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New Year, New You?

New Year's Resolution's can be great for some people, but they can also be really problematic for others, they can increase pressure and stress and exacerbate the need to feel perfect or make drastic changes to our lives.

New Years resolutions that are unrealistic, unattainable or even outlandish can lead to disappointment, diminishing motivation and can create or add to our own self-doubts and low self-esteem. It is easy to create this fantasy version of ourselves, more so around the New Year, and make resolutions to become that person, but these tend to be completely unrealistic and we set ourselves up for failure for having too big expectations. Failure in these instances is almost inevitable and then we feel guilty or like we aren't good enough and this feeds our own inner critic that can make us feel worse than ever.

Resolutions can be great motivators, as long as they aren't coming from a place of pressure or obligation - or because you feel like you have too because everyone else is. Especially this year, it's 2022 and this pandemic is still going on, I don't think anyone thought we'd still be here two years on! We have all made adaptations, we are still continuing to make adaptations to life, adding extra stresses on top of this might be that step too far this year, for some.

There are some things we can do to make resolutions less stressful, maybe this year you take a break from them, or maybe we need to change the narrative around 'resolutions'. New Years are a great time for reflection, looking back at the year you've had, the things you've succeeded at, the things you are still working on and the goals you still have for the future. Take a look at what your goals are, are they realistic? Is now a good time to start working towards this goal? Is it something you WANT to do or something you feel you should?

Once you have come up with your goals, don't try to overhaul your entire life in the first month of the year, make small positive changes, and keep it consistent. Celebrate your own achievements, congratulate yourself, even if they seem small, this will feed your confidence and build your self-esteem and increase your motivation to succeed at the next step of your goal. Find a way to make yourself accountable, whether it's a gym buddy, telling a trusted friend, partner or family member your aims, or creating your own private bullet journal to tick off your successes.

For the future, if you have goals or something you want to achieve, do you need to wait until the next New Year? If you've decided what you want to do in June or November, why wait until January 1st, if you start when you've decided upon your goal you'll get there sooner, by the time the New Year rolls around you might have already succeeded or be further along your journey and be even more motivated for the future.

Lastly, all I'd say is to not feel pressured to make this big commitment to change just because it's the New Year, we've all been there, saying I'm going to do this or that and either putting it off week by week with some excuse or failing early on because it hasn't been realistic. Keep your goals personal and private if you need to, don't feel like you have to share if you don't want to. And if you need some help with your goals or keeping yourself accountable, feel free to get in touch and see what we can achieve together.

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